Inside out
I feel bad because my mind is odd.
I mean I can be just sitting there and all of a sudden I feel like crap. No reason, no ones fault. Nothing. All I need is some time and preferably some one to be there to tell me that no the world is not spinning and that the world is not swallowing me as I stand or lie there.
So...yesh

A few days ago I woke up from a really bad dream were Ben decided that he hated me and that he didn't want to talk to me anymore. I woke up so depressed, I went to bed depressed and woke up worse after all my dreams. All I wanted to do was bleed out, loose my grip on life and keep on bleeding. Instead I took a shower. Which seems like an odd choice, but it works for me...for my mental well-being, so that I didn't break down, I took a blade with me. So now I have 7 new ones on my ribs. I figure that’s better than dead. I know I could never commit suicide in a shower.

I don't know where this is going or what my point is.
So I shall be quite now.

- posted by Catherine @ 1/19/2005 08:47:00 PM